Is the dynamic angry? Far too many fights? Intensity? Hostility?
Are there constant misunderstandings? Like he just doesn’t “get you”?
Is there a distance? A disconnect? Like you’re together but still lonely?
Do you feel like you’re always chasing after him, and he’s always running away?
Is he totally disengaged? Interested in everything except you?
Does it feel like he steps all over you? Or being with him makes you feel small?
In Japan they fill cracks in vessels with gold. That’s because Once cracked, things have all the more potential for beauty. A deeper beauty.
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My name is Brocha Speyer and I coach women to upgrade their relationships by getting into their own skin, figuring out what they want out of the relationship, and developing the emotional skills they need to make their dream a reality.
Because the harsh fact is that if you just keep barking up the same tree over and over again, you’ll keep getting the same results. If you don’t take the initiative and start shaking things up, nobody else is going to do it for you. Ouch. I know.
But there’s good news too.
You know the expression “it take two to tango”?
Well, I believe relationships are like a dance. And as the expression indicates, each of the dancers influences the rhythm. So if one of the people changes a step in her own dance, there’s no way for the other to maintain his old rut.
Which means you don’t necessarily need the other person’s buy-in in order to fix things.
You can never change another person directly. But you can change the dynamic; you can change the dance. And then you’ll find yourself in a whole new reality.
The key to changing the dance is an art form known as “differentiation” which we’ll cultivate together.
You can be your authentic self without having to hide parts of yourself or give up what’s important to you.
He can be his authentic self without having to give up parts of who he is or pretend to be something different.
When two human beings authentically bring their FULL SELVES to the relationship, this can cause tension. But this tension is actually a gateway to a far deeper relationship…
Well, it’s definitely possible. But it takes courage. And skill. I’ll walk you through a deep process (using a range of therapeutic tools) that tones the muscles you’ll need to accomplish this (depending on your particular situation and which of your muscles need toning).
Awaken Your Inner Compass
Feel the power of knowing yourself inside and out. Develop a moment-to-moment awareness of your inner landscape, so you can pinpoint your feelings, thoughts, desires, and needs with razor-sharp clarity. When you truly understand what’s driving you (and claim ownership of it) magic happens in your relationship.
End the Tug-of-War Inside You
Discover the life-changing skill of noticing when different parts of you want different things—and embrace your inner conflicts with grace. Instead of feeling torn, or hoping the “world out there” (aka your spouse) will figure it out for you (he rarely does!) you’ll learn how to align your inner world and be powerfully decisive.
Speak Your Truth Like Never Before
Say goodbye to mixed messages and awkward conversations. Master the art of expressing your feelings, thoughts, and desires in a way that’s clear, confident, and inspiring. Your spouse will finally understand exactly where you’re coming from.
Break Free from the Grip of Defensiveness
Imagine handling tough moments without spiraling into old habits. You’ll learn to spot your defense mechanisms in real-time—and manage them like a pro—so you stay grounded and in control, even during challenging conversations.
No more getting swept up in your spouse’s emotional ups and downs. You’ll develop the resilience to actively manage emotional contagion, so you can stay calm, clear, and connected to your own truth—even when emotions are running high.
Transform how you connect by becoming authentically interested in your partner’s inner world. You’ll learn to understand their thoughts and feelings as reflections of them—not judgments of you. Begin to really hear your spouse without feeling the need to interrupt, react, or take their words personally. It’s a game-changer for emotional intimacy.
Gain the ability to truly understand your spouse in light of their personal history and experiences. With this perspective, you’ll build empathy, compassion, and a connection that’s deeper than ever before.
Open-heartedness is the secret sauce of every thriving relationship—and now, you’ll master it. Learn how to be there for your other half with authenticity and compassion, even when it feels difficult. It’s the bridge to a stronger, more loving bond.
I was at the end of my pregnancy, and I knew I needed to work through my last birth experience which was very traumatic. I needed someone compassionate and very supportive to help me heal.
Brocha was the one. She guided me towards reaching a state of complete calm before my birth, and coming with a healthy approach, and real comfort from within.
That night I gave birth in the most beautiful way. I have tremendous gratitude to her, and I know it would not have been the same without her.
Brocha Speyer has a special way of understanding the client’s needs… and a brilliant way of channeling the session in the direction for the most growth.
Brocha has a very serene and comfortable way and her smile is full of warmth. She knows how to keep the session focused…and sincerely cares about her clients.
